Love and Marriage

Sexuality

The changing image of  marriage and family has also given new significance to human sexuality. "Fertile sexuality" was the  generally recognized principle in the past; today, sexuality may  be fruitful,  but does not have to be so. An increasing  number of people  even believe that it should not be fruitful. This is true  not  only for  nations  which  are  over populated,   but  also  married  couples   wondering whether or not an additional child can be justified.

Today,  even couples who are fond of  children  view  their  sexual life primarily as a means of expressing their personal relationship. They see their sexual encounter as a  sign  of  love,  a high point of  their  mutual experience, and sexual  harmony  gives  a  great deal of joy to their lives.  Especially at the moment of sexual fulfillment they experience each other as precious, unique and irreplaceable.

For  most  married  couples,  it is normal to have a family.  Fertility is taken for granted,  but is  nevertheless a special sign of their conjugal love. They expect children as a gift, not as a burden; but even without children the purpose of marriage and love is not lost for them,  although for some couples,  ardent longings remain unfulfilled.

Marriage and society

To care  for  marriage  and  family  is also an important task of the state. Citizens expect  to  be  helped,  not only when they are young, preparing for marriage and starting a family, but also after they are married and have children. Governments give financial support and tax relief and provide counsel on matrimony, family, education etc. Not only do married couples need help from society, but society needs healthy marriages and families.

Therefore, a wedding is not just a private matter. Matters such as living together, property ownership and children's education all involve society in general.  Through the children, future generations are affected. For this reason, a marriage cannot be legitimized by private sexual acts or private matrimonial promises. The will to get married must be a publicly expressed decision. Without this, society is unable to recognize the marriage and protect it by law. In addition, public confirmation of a marriage can give life support to a marriage in crisis.

Christ and matrimony

Until now, our thoughts did not refer to faith or the Church, although the churches in particular attach great importance to marriage and families. The Catholic Church even calls Holy Matrimony a Sacrament.  This is because of what we said earlier: living together as  husband and wife and trusting the love and fidelity of the partner is one of our basic longings.  Marriage  as institution is merely the human desire for a permanent relationship embedded in a public, legal framework. Marriage does not necessarily have an ecclesiastical or religious foundation, but responds to basic human desires.